Here at robertson technologies, we pride ourselves on plain speaking. Here are some common computing terms and what they mean – explained in plain English. That’s a non-jargon way of saying this is our computing lexicography.

Hard Drive
The fragile bit at the heart of your computer that carries all your data and other stuff that makes your computer work. In reality, not very hard at all – that’s why it needs a lot of backup. In a fist fight, it would run away. There is no soft drive.

Engineer (male)
Suave, sophisticated, dapper individual, whose dress sense shames Beau Brummell. The intellectual peer of Albert Einstein, with the wit of George Clooney and the charm of Patrick Stewart. Sorts out computing problems before lunch and great with kids.

Engineer (female)
The versatility of Myleen Class with the independence of Lara Croft thrown in for good measure. A girls’ girl, and a commensurate professional. Sorts out computing problems before lunch, and enjoys a game of football – especially with kids.

Keyboard
Infuriating mental torture device developed by a now-deposed South American junta. Designed to break fingernails and spirit all in one. Sometimes thought of as electric Scrabble. Curiously percussive – hitting it harder makes other computer devices work better.

RTFM
Invitation to examine instruction protocols before further recourse to expert assistance. “Read The Flipping Manual”.